PeerBook Pressure

Friday, September 19th, 2008 at 2:11 pm by EbonyMom

After years of resisting I finally gave in to the pressure. I actually created a Facebook account. Some dear friends gently encouraged me to give Facebook a go - but for some reason the whole idea of a permanent social network source simply gives me the heebie jeebies.

Now, you would think as someone who blogs regularly about all kinds of details or her life that a little online networking would be no big deal. However I guess I’m still concerned with safety issues and considering I’ve never fully come out of the blog closet. It still makes me nervous to think of having my personal information plastered anywhere that I don’t personally own, no matter how password protected it may be.

I signed up with Facebook using a fake name but still feel uncomfortable even going to look around. I guess it just all seems so voyeuristic to check in on people I knew from high school (notice I said PEOPLE not neccessarily friends) because while I’m curious to see how people’s lives are doing, I’m not really interested in reconnecting with anyone (perhaps a weird trait of mine but my high school days were pretty dark so reliving anything from that time is not a high priority).

Do you facebook? What have been the positive aspects that keep you going there? My profile name is Soulographer Radiance if you’d like to say hello. We’ll see if I ever feel comfortable enough to become a full blown Facebook fanatic. For now I’ll just stay shy until I figure out a way to not feel so exposed.

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11 Comments

I won’t do Facebook or Myspace. Just seems like one more thing I would have to do. I won’t succumb to the pressure! Tell me how it goes. :)

Comment by Justice Jones | September 19th, 2008 2:32 pm | Permalink

I have found facebook to be a valuable tool for me to reconnect with old friends/classmates and stay in touch with my close friends. I have friends all over the world and it is rare that I will pick up the phone to call anyone let alone overseas. If my friends are online I can chat or just communicate with them with my updates. It can be a time drain so I generally check in once every couple of days but it is a great too.

I posted about this last week because I was debating with myself about becoming “friends” with folks I blog with. Entre into my “real” life with my “real” friends was something I was not sure I would be comfortable with. In the end I did - but it is no big deal because my “bloggy” friends don’t know to come looking for me there. Opps - I guess now you know!

Comment by Renée aka Mekhismom | September 19th, 2008 5:47 pm | Permalink

Justice Jones: you sound like me! hehe Having one more thing to check other than blog and email is probably another reason it hasn’t sucked me in- I just don’t have the time.

Renee: See I guess that’s the other thing- the people I am connected with on facebook are ones I already regularly converse with on another medium. So perhaps that’s why I haven’t gotten too attached? Few of my local friends know that I blog (although that may be changing) so my blog connections and friendships have been very special to me as well especially when I lived far away from the majority of my friends and family, and knew very few other stay at home women of color.

Comment by EbonyMom | September 19th, 2008 6:23 pm | Permalink

I facebook. I’ve reconnected with a few friend from highschool and college. My family is on there as well. The friend that sent me the request to join is one that I chat with often. We’re sometimes too busy for a phone conversation, so this is how we keep up. I also like the special interest groups you can join. There are privacy options where you can restrict information from others’ viewing. I’m actually working on that right now. I tried to find you, but couldn’t. You can look me up by my first and last name.

Comment by Kim | September 19th, 2008 8:05 pm | Permalink

I used to facebook, but not anymore. Like you Emom, I found that the people I would connect with there, I am already connected to through other methods.

Comment by e&p | September 20th, 2008 7:58 am | Permalink

BTW, I also used a fake name when I signed up, hehe.

Comment by e&p | September 20th, 2008 7:59 am | Permalink

Kim: I’ll see if I can find you once I get up enough nerve to logon again. My family is really active on a geneology site now so its almost like facebook but just family (its too much fun!) I’ll have to blog about it soon. I guess if my family were regulars that would be an incentive too but other than the college age folx I don’t think any of the rest utilize it.

E&P: See somehow I would have guessed that about you too, we always have so much in common. You got me wanting to go all Nettie and Celie- clap *You and me must never part* lol :D

Comment by EbonyMom | September 20th, 2008 9:28 pm | Permalink

I myspace. I first started a myspace account and canceled it because some named “B*tches want money” asked to join I freaked out. I wanted no part of myspace after that, but then I met a person on the street who I kinda new and she extolled the benefits of myspace. I rejoined, and I became a lot more discriminatory about who I accepted as a friend, what I want to show about myself, etc. I am a rather open person, so I don’t have my account private, but I don’t use my full name. I do have pics of my kids, and I’ve made a point of creating an atmosphere I like.

myspace.com/beadandjewelrydesign

Comment by Jewelry Rockstar | September 21st, 2008 7:47 pm | Permalink

Can’t wait to hear about the genealogy site! I love finding out about our family. Some stuff has been bittersweet, but hey it’s our history, right? Blog soon!!!!!!!!

Comment by Kim | September 21st, 2008 9:22 pm | Permalink

Yeah girl I facebook. I don’t know why, something else to do I guess. I’ve hooked up with old folks from back in the dayz. It’s kinda cool, not to mention my family on there too. (Alyson Richardson is my FaceBook name - which is my actual name LOL)

Comment by aly | September 22nd, 2008 12:02 pm | Permalink

I use Facebook and I am open with my identity it still freaks me out a bit. Pretty much my policy is I only want to be friends with folks I actually know, needless to say my friend list small but that’s cool with me. However I don’t post pics of my kids are spouse either on Facebook or on my blog.

It is a neat tool for connecting with old friends though I am reminded there is a reason they are old friends =).

Comment by blackgirlinmaine | September 24th, 2008 5:00 pm | Permalink

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